Here We Go!

Well the word is out. The Boyers are headed to Abilene, TX for the Masters in Marriage and Family Therapy program. This is undoubtedly a big move for us and our family.

I came to Houston for the first time in the summer of 1998 for a youth ministry internship with Spring Woodlands Church of Christ. I went back to school my senior year knowing that I was different, but unaware of what God had in store for me. Fast forward to early spring of '99. and I received a phone call from Dave Gibbs and Travis Bryant asking if I would consider coming on full time. I fairly quickly said no, and then they called me back just a few weeks later and asked me to reconsider. I spent some time fasting and praying and God sent me to 1 Samuel. If you know the story of Eli and Samuel, you can imagine the story unfolding. God calls out to Samuel in his sleep, but Samuel did not yet know the voice of the Lord. After the third time of waking up Eli, Samuel was told by him to answer the call, "Speak, Lord, for your servant is listening." I knew I needed to listen, and felt God tell me to answer his call to ministry. I began full time in the summer of '99.

Megan and I met in the fall, but she was dating someone at the time. We developed a friendship and after I ran off the other guy (really he ran himself off), we began dating a few months later. We married April 7th, 2001, and began a whirlwind life of ministry together. After a few more years of youth ministry, I transitioned out to another ministry position the summer of 2006. Claire was born about 9 months later and Eliam 21 month after that. It's hard to believe that they are now 9 years and 7 years old respectively.

Megan and I have dreamed many dreams over the years of where God might take us next. And a few times we considered chasing those dreams. But each time before we could take a move, God seemed to say wait. So we have waited, and we have been blessed. We have developed such sweet and deep friendships because we stayed. We have people in our lives that will forever be as close as family. We are deeply honored by our friendships and we wouldn't trade them for anything. But now the time has come, it is time that we must go.

A year and a half ago, I again felt the Lord calling saying that I needed to apply for the Marriage and Family Therapy program at ACU. On the one hand, Megan and I have done Marriage Mentoring for 8 plus years now using Prepare/Enrich, and we love doing this together. It has been great for our marriage and hopefully it has helped a few out along the way too. On the other hand, I started a Masters in Christian Ministry in 2012, the last thing I wanted to think about was another couple of years in school. We also had been dreaming about starting a ministry in Colorado, and we have been working on that for quite some time. All of our plans didn't come together as we hoped they would and then the summer hit. We were restless. Then thing got a little out of sorts at Grace Crossing (formerly Spring Woodlands where we still serve), and we didn't really feel comfortable leaving last summer to pursue the degree. So we stayed. God continued to bless us and grow us.

We are so thankful for our Grace Crossing family. They have been a huge blessing over the years. We are who we are because of the many lives that have influenced us and supported us. But now after 17 years, it's time for a change. God is taking us to Abilene where I can finish up one degree and begin the next. We don't have jobs yet, we don't have a home, but we know we are in God's hands. To complicate things just a bit, we'll be helping with some backpacking trips this summer in Colorado. So we'll be off grid, in and out of availability throughout the summer as we help some adults reconnect with God.

Life is an adventure. When you are chasing after God, you never know exactly where he will take you. Isn't that just His nature? When you think you're in control and have it all figured out, He reminds you that it is all in His hands, in his timing.

I ran across a quote this weekend that really reminded me of God's nature:

"The God who blesses and orders our lives is the God who disrupts it in order to make things new."

God is making things new for us...and we're holding on to Him as we go along for the ride.

Discipline: Structure and Grace

Discipline comes in many forms. There is physical discipline, of which I thought I knew about until I started running marathons. There is work ethic, which really is a job related discipline to do and be all that you can for your place of employment. There is spiritual discipline, which help to smooth out the rough spots of faith that inevitably will come. Then there is disciplining your children...which makes all of the other forms of discipline seem easy.

Last night in a small group I lead, as we were discussing what discipline looks like in a home that is trying to follow an almighty Father God, I came to a realization. Discipline is really a combination of structure and grace. Yes, it takes both. No, there is no magic formula.

Much like the discipline I had to learn in marathon training, there is a rhythm a "structure" if you will, to discipline. But this must be constantly injected with grace. Here's what I mean.

I have a set training schedule when I begin to prepare for races. Mondays and Wednesdays are workout days. I have a simple focus that involves some complex movement leg and arm exercises. Tuesday, Thursday and Saturdays are running days (there is a formula to it...but that is another blog...). Fridays are a flex day, sometimes body weight bearing workouts and sometimes runs. Sunday's I take off...completely for rest and recovery.

Here is where the grace comes in. Sometimes I choose to run on Monday night, with my favorite running group, instead of Tuesday morning. Sometimes I miss a work out. Sometimes I move a run to Friday. There is flexibility to listen to my body. There is grace when I miss. I just pick up the next workout/run or modify.

Disciplining our children works much the same way. My goal number one to help the children realize that the reason they are being punished isn't because they did something "bad." Instead I want them to realize we are helping them to reach their full potential of what God created them to be and become. So I want them to fully understand what specifically it is that they did wrong. Take time with them, explain the "why" as much or more than the "what" of what they did wrong.

Secondly, I want them to know how much I love them. I really desire what is best for them and their life and that's why I can't allow this unhealthy habit or action to continue. They need to know they are loved. This may need to happen multiple times throughout the process.

Thirdly, I want them to understand the act of asking for forgiveness. Our world could really use some people in it that understand taking responsibility for their actions and asking forgiveness appropriately. This means asking for forgiveness from those who they may have hurt, from their parents, from God, and from themselves. By the way, if you didn't handle yourself well in the heat of the moment when correction was needing to be given to your child, this is a good time to ask their forgiveness too.

Fourthly, administer appropriate punishment for the action. If possible this needs to be predetermined so that you don't get caught up in the moment. If you are married you should consult your spouse if possible (especially if it is a bigger offense or not something with a predetermined discipline). There is no silver bullet to punishment. It's different for every child. It's different for every family. The key is consistency and follow through.

Lastly, leave the child space to think about his/her actions and the subsequent punishment. We don't often enough ask our children to reflect upon their actions, what lead to those actions, who they were following, why they did what they did...you get the picture. Let them sit in it. Let them stew in it. Then when they come back around show them love. Love them and remind them that they are a good kid and this is just part of growing up and becoming a Godly man or woman.

At all steps in this process be quick to give grace and love. Sometimes we overreact as parents. Sometimes we come down to harshly. Sometimes we aren't tough enough or fail to follow through. Give yourself some grace: you're not a perfect parent! Give your children some grace: they aren't perfect either!

Our ultimate goal in parenting, as in life, is to draw those around us to a loving relation to our Father in heaven. In everything we do, we have the challenge reflecting the Father's love, to draw them near to him, to let them see our struggle with it as well. We are praying for all of you, who like us, struggle with this on a day to day basis. May you know the Father's love for you, as you seek his wisdom in every situation.

Proverbs 3:5-6, 11-12
⁵ Trust in the Lord with all your heart
    and lean not on your own understanding;
⁶ in all your ways submit to him,
    and he will make your paths straight.

¹¹ My son, do not despise the Lord’s discipline,
    and do not resent his rebuke,
¹² because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
    as a father the son he delights in

(Basic structure adapted from "Dedicated: Training Your Children to Trust and Follow Jesus" 
by Houser, Harrington, and Harrington) 

Life-Bridges

Sometimes we come to a place in life that we aren't sure which way to go. We know that there is a bridge to cross, something new, something different, something... But often we aren't even sure which bridge is the right bridge. Ever been there?

My family and I have been walking this out for over a year now. We know the vision God has placed on our hearts for Colorado, or some kind of land that he longs to be a place of recovery for those who serve in his kingdom. But the doors just haven't quite opened the way we hoped.

On the other hand, we love the local church and believe God has planted it deep within our hearts to serve and draw people into close relationship with him. We call that discipleship. But we believe God has "released" us from our current place where we have served for 16 years. 

I also have been working on a Masters degree for 4 years now and the end is in sight. Maybe. I applied for and have been accepted into a Marriage and Family Therapy program starting in August. On the one hand I would love to have the expertise and certification, on the other hand...2 more years of grad school...

So here we are at a bridge, and we're not quite sure what's on the the other side.

Praying. We are praying. We have been praying. We'll continue to pray.

"I waited patiently for the Lord; he turned to me and heard my cry." Psalm 40:1

I think the hardest part is praying and waiting for answers. No, I'm not expecting God to have a shining light come down and say "go this way." I don't expect a Bethlehem star to suddenly appear, showing us which way to go. But I long to hear God's voice. I long to see the doors open up that are so obviously his hand that I can't say no. That I wouldn't want to say no.

Maybe your like me, you've come to the proverbial fork in the road, or a bridge that just can't quite see over. Maybe you've asked a cried out to God and he seems silent on your future. Don't give up. Don't quit pressing in. God hasn't abandoned you. He's growing you. He's moving you into maturity.

"Consider it pure joy, my brothers and sisters,^[a] whenever you face trials of many kinds, ³ because you know that the testing of your faith produces perseverance. ⁴ Let perseverance finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything." James 1:2-4 


What are waiting to hear from God about? What can we lift up in your life to our good Father?

Full Life Adventure Video

If you want to see a little taste of what a “Full Life Adventure” looks like, here is a video of the first couple of days of a trip. I’ll get the next video up as soon as I can finish it. Enjoy!

-Eddie Boyer

I don't usually feature other writers on this page...but my wife wrote a beautiful piece talking about where we are on our current adventure, and what God has in mind for us. I pray this is helpful. I request prayers for us. Most of all I pray that we are continually shaped and molded by God as we journey with him. 

-Eddie

This is just the beginning…

We are in the waiting…the hard and silent wait. The long, long months (even years) after hearing
the promise of the Lord over our future. Yet, we are now having to walk through the desert to get
there, or sometimes stay exactly where we are (which can be even more difficult). Like Abram and
Sarai being called to a new land, to the unknown, into the trust. To trust the Lord with all we have. To fully rely on His plan and not our own. To start walking in faith, into the wilderness and entwining our future in the spoken promise of our God.

The summer of 1996, I was facing brave. Me, the shy girl, the girl that didn’t really feel like she belonged but desperately wanted to, signed up for her youth group wilderness trek trip. Going with a mostly seasoned and experienced group of adults and other teens, off into the Colorado Rockies to climb Mt. Elbert, the tallest in the state. Fear and doubt surged repeatedly through my entire being as I, the freshman never been in snow Texan, prepared for the journey. I carried my 40ish lb. pack up the rocky soil path. At that time, it was the most challenging, uncomfortable, longest, coldest week of my life. The highlight was standing on a summit at an elevation of 14,433 ft… and experiencing my first snowfall all on my 16th birthday. I came back to Texas  with a blistered sun burned chin and a feeling that I checked mountain climbing permanently off my bucket list.

Fast-forward to the summer of 2002, as a newly wed wife of a youth minister, accepted the challenge to once again head to the mountains. Older and slightly more optimistic about this trek, I prepared to hopefully impress my new outdoor loving husband. Going more prepared, more knowledgeable, more excited than 6 years earlier we journeyed once again up the well worn path of Mt. Elbert. This climb was still challenging but not nearly what I remembered or feared. I’m sure I had extra endurance  and drive with the love of my life next to me. Standing again on the summit, overlooking the valley below began a surge of love for this physical, spiritual challenge.

Summer of 2013, my first time back in the mountains after years of school, work and raising two babies into kids old enough for me to leave behind for a week. I had prepared the whole previous year for this experience. Running, working out, buying better gear…here I was hopeful to take on a
new mountain. Once again, with my husband by my side and this time dragging some dear friends with us, we took a group of teenagers up Mt. Tabeguache (14,162 ft.). The crew, the teenagers, the
friends all helped shape this trip as an amazing and
memorable trip. Yeah, my boots rubbed my heels off. Yes, me and my favorite high schooler had to boulder our way down by ourselves trying to catch up to one of our guides. Yes, I ended up getting a parasite when I got home and spent a day in the emergency room. Yet, the fire was lit. I was desperate for another trail and another summit.

Back again June of 2014 with a adult group of our own. Leading them up Mt. Blanca (14,351 ft.),which has one of the longest, rockiest, hottest hikes to base camp. With a great group and a  gorgeous valley to set up camp in we gathered around camp fires, told stories, laughed and studied the word under a star lit sky. I didn’t  summit this mountain (due to two not feeling well-I volunteered to stay behind). However, I did experience the beauty of this scenery by hiking around and meeting an all too friendly marmot and exploring an old decaying mountain cabin. Allowing, my soul to soak in the beauty of God’s fingerprints all around me. Feeling the song “Oh, how He loves me”, singing it’s way through my veins. Desiring to take in and memorize every angle of that high altitude clear watered lake and every peak that surrounds it.

Seeing our adults off on their way back to Houston, Eddie and I stayed to wait on our church youth group to make their way up a few days later. While we waited we day hiked Mt. Yale (14,200 ft.). I would of never thought I would day hike a 14er. Such an impossible idea to this flat-landers brain. We managed however, to conquer it and make it back down in time for dinner. We laughed, we talked, we took A LOT of pictures, and opened our hearts to the birth of a dream of being in the mountains more than just in the summer time. As we hiked Mt. Democrat (14,154 ft.) with our youth group that next week; God etched a dream on our hearts that we could not ignore. A dream of the mountains being our Promised Land but we had no idea how God expected us to get there. We came back from that trip whispering prayers and dreaming dreams of what may be in our near (or not so near) future. And wondering what is God up to? With our hearts jumping in with full commitment and minds whirling with possibilities.


The following summer of 2015, we once again had an adult group put together. Eddie went ahead to help lead our church youth group, so we were meeting him up there. Our adult group this time is 14 strong. A mix of married and singles, a mix of twenty somethings and up to the prime of life forties. All desperate to hear and see God is a whole new light. All braving the unexplored and conquering fears and doubts with every step. We began up Mt. Belford (14,203 ft.) singing and talking excitedly. This is one of the prettiest trails I’ve ever seen. Following a mountain stream with various falls, surges and dams. Trees towered overhead as we rounded narrow bends along the cliff trail. We walked through glorious valley’s tearing off our jackets and long sleeves as the sun warmed us. We settled into our campsites in gracious unity. Working together gathering water and starting meals. This group had my heart and I knew the Lord was among us and the Spirit was going to show up in a powerful way. Our wet and wild summit was quite the adventure, pushing many beyond limits. Wearing them down physically and allowing sole reliance on the Lord. Many events unfolded as Eddie and I had to hustle a couple off the mountain that same day, to send them home for a family emergency. But as I sit here and reflect on that week, I realize how at comfortable I felt, how I felt at home.

Back in Houston, we sold our home and readied ourselves to head to the hills…but God had a different timeline in mind. We stayed with friends and are now in an apartment, while spending lots of time in prayer for our church and for our future. We decided to get incorporated and through that process officially birthed Full Life Adventures. Now the task of completing the paperwork to submit to be a Non-profit and launch a fundraising campaign to buy the promised land in Colorado. Believing still, the promise spoken by our God. We are waiting. Waiting on Him to continue to guide us, whether by burning bush, pillar of fire or still small voice into this new endeavor. Like, Abram and Sarai, feeling that our age may be working against us. That we need to hurry this process along but knowing His timing is always best. Then also, are we to laugh at the thought that we may be called into the desert (Abilene, TX) to pursue Eddie’s desire to finish a Marriage & Family Therapy degree? Are we to take two more years to have all the many, many pieces fall into place? We know and trust the big picture that God put on our hearts…we know that had led and highlighted every step we have taken. That just like hiking the mountains the trail may be long, and tedious at times, that the summit will still be there. Waiting for us, beckoning us to keep pressing in and trusting our Lord into the promise. That this is just the beginning…
-Megan